I'm sorry, dear.' Salaark and Leegaain, the "gods" Aran had just invoked, replied in unison. 'We can't help you but know that we believe in you. Don't give up.'
Were you listening to me the whole time?' Aran blushed up to his ears in
embarrassment.
'No, but if you call our names from so close, we can't help but hear you.' The Guardians replied. 'Don't worry. We won't tell your parents of all the swear words you've learned.' 'Dammit! I had forgotten that Grandma and Grandpa are gods. Guardians. The thing people pray to.' Aran inwardly whined.
'More training, less whining, young man.' Leegaain said. 'You are wasting precious time. Tomorrow waits for no one.'
'Yes, Grandpa.'Aran nodded, still freaked out someone had actually answered his prayers.
After he managed to calm down, he started to study the problem instead of blindly tackling it.
At this point, all the things I've done to achieve the first and second steps are no longer useful. I need something new. Something I'm missing. The problem is I have no idea what it is.' Aran thought.
He studied the blazing fire and then tried to make contact with it with his mana. This time it was just contact, not control. Nothing happened anyway.
After snack time and exhausting all theories he could come up with, he moved on to manipulating his own light, the one shining where his mana core was supposed to be. Aran weaved spells, moved them around, and spread the elements throughout his body but to no avail.
During one of his many attempts, however, he discovered something new.
'Wait a second. Even though I can't alter the intensity of my light nor can I make it budge by a hair's breadth, it's not immutable. My blue light's position is fixed but when I conjure a spell, any spell, it beats like a heart.'
Aran put his observation to the test, casting spells in rapid succession. The blue light's intensity and position remained the same yet its size expanded and contracted slightly. After careful study, Aran confirmed that the burning in his abdomen was caused by those pulsations.
'Okay, this is definitely new yet useless. What did Lith say about the secret of Awakening? The steps are as follows: one, feeling your own mana. Check. Two, feeling the world energy. Check. Three: merge them together to form a mana flow.
"The question is: how do I merge them if both of them seem to be immutable and unmoving?"
Aran studied his blue light one more time and failed to find a clue. Strong with his new understanding of the conundrum, he went back to observing the blazing blue flame that burned so close yet remained untouchable.
As he examined the blue flame, Aran noticed that it too wasn't immutable.
During the first days of his practice, he had missed it because his perception was too poor. Later, instead, he had missed it because his improved perception made the flame blinding.
Only now could Aran notice that just like his mana core, the world energy beat at his own rhythm like a living heart. After the realization hit him, the rest came easy. 'Breathing. I must breathe not at random, but following the pulse of the world energy. Big Brother was right all along but I was too narrow-minded to understand. When it comes to my spells, I'm the river that carries the mana of my spells.
'When it comes to Awakening, the world energy is the river and I'm the water' Unbeknownst to Aran, the flaming energy in front of him wasn't the world energy coming from the mana geyser but Salaark's essence.
She had done nothing to help him but her mere presence was more overwhelming than any mana geyser. As soon as Aran had managed to heighten his perception, her power had shone on him like a lighthouse.
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