Rowan's uniqueness could not be denied, his power and potential were absolute, and even with the barest given to him, he would be able to make miracles out of it.
The Primordial Record had previously called him a Nascent Primordial, and that was before he evolved into a dimensional entity, a being that even the Singularity did not fully understand. The further evolution of his dimensional flesh was a testament to his comprehension ability.
Despite the pressure he was undergoing as he planned for the battle against the Reflections and any unexpected enemies that might come up, he was also working on his power base and creating something better than what he previously had.
He was fully cognizant of the fact that his mental state and potential would destabilize anyone who viewed it.
So Rowan was wary of scaring these powerful beings with a display of his entire potential, and he did not want to reveal too much for them to wish for nothing but to possess his powers, he just needed to find that sweet spot in between fear and desire.
This turned out to be much harder than he thought, he had pretty much broken every concept of normalcy repeatedly when it came to revealing his capabilities to these two, and even till this moment he had not begun to accurately judge what was considered a supreme genius in all of reality and how he could lessen his talents to be considered a supreme genius and not a monster, a freak… Old Man Seed knows how to name things, does he not? Rowan's thoughts wryly.
What is the difference between a lovable freak that is cherished for their uniqueness and a monstrous freak that scares you for the impossibilities of their actions?
Andar was a lovable freak, the mage was a perfect genius, the sort that was hailed by the masses as a champion of determination, tenacity, and grit… he would face challenges, and he would suffer, and from his suffering, he would claw out a victory by the skin of his teeth.
He would have fellow geniuses who would compete with him on his journey, they would inspire him, he would fall in love, conquer the great threat facing existence, and all would love him… Andar was perfect… the perfect freak.
Rowan had no equal. Every step he took crossed countless gulfs. He would not struggle for many Eras to comprehend a reality-destroying technique, in his battle against one of his greatest foes, he had weakened himself just to gain a title. He was a monstrous freak, one that would scare those who knew him.
'So, I have to make myself better than Andar, and less than myself in their eyes.' Sigh… 'This is so very irritating, but it is all for a good cause I suppose.'
It would have been better if he had told the old man that he had not succeeded yet, and found a way to do other things and then as a few thousand years go by, revealed that he had mastered the Supreme circle, but that would leave him stuck inside the Tenebris armor for longer than he was comfortable with.
The truth was that he was always going to shock them. Old Man Seed believed he needed tens of millions of years at the least in order to succeed. Rowan could not bear to twiddle his thumbs for such an extended period of time just to appear harmless, to be a lovable freak.
The cat was already out of the bag and he could not swallow back his words. A part of him understood this position and knew he could only push forward, he guessed he had to find out their threshold for miracles, after all, did they not all emerge from such a land?
Comments
The readers' comments on the novel: The Primordial Record