I could spend hours talking to you and it only feels like a handful of moments. And I know that life can be difficult and challenges get in the way, but with you, life feels effortless. It feels like the struggle is worth it. Just to see you at the end of the day. When I am with you, the sadness goes away.
*** Pillow Thoughts; Courtney Pepperneil ***
It was not easy for Cane to deal with this feeling of fear. Those blissful moments were just that, momentary. Then he noticed Iris’ exhausted face and how some parts of her body were bruised. The color irritated him. He was afraid something so bad had happened to her.
But then, if she could survive their previous intimate times when he had not been careful enough, she would survive this, too. This consolatory thought was not really helpful, because it irked him even more to be reminded of something that forever would be engraved in his mind and heart.
"You don’t need to be worried, Cane. I am only a little bit tired," Iris said, as she stretched her arms out.
Cane carefully leaned closer and rested his forehead on her shoulder, as they hugged each other. In this position, it was obvious that he didn’t put all of his weight on her.
"How do you feel?" Cane asked after some time passed. He licked the bruise on her neck, which was the result of him biting his mark on her skin.
"I feel... good," Iris cleared her throat. "How do you feel?"
Cane stopped licking her bruise. "Awful." He started to communicate his feelings now, though it was not the answer that Iris anticipated.
"What?" Iris pushed him slightly away from her, so she could look at his face. He still had this emotionless expression, but his eyes were so gloomy, as if there was a storm brewing inside him. "Did I... was it that bad? I told you I didn’t know what to do."
Cane was speechless, he was mad because the outcome was not what he wanted it to be. Iris got hurt. But here she was; thinking she didn’t perform well enough. Who cared about that?
"Iris, you can play dead and lay down still like a plank for all I care." Cane’s voice was very stern. "I will not complain and still find you attractive."
Iris blushed. What was that supposed to mean? "Is that a compliment?"
Hearing the question, Cane chuckled. He laughed more nowadays, too, even with the tragedy that struck his pack and how they were in this dire situation. She still managed to crack him up, even when he was upset and frustrated.
The way she blushed, the way she asked him timidly while trying so hard to look nonchalant, but failing miserably. He liked this side of her and how he would find her ogling at him with fascination at times.
Cane was not sure what she found so attractive about him. But he could see the way she loved him fearlessly. She wanted to try everything for him. She stretched her boundaries and tested her limits for him. She endured everything... the pain, the agony, the hardship that came when she chose to be with him and here she was; still staring at him with adoration in her eyes.
He was a monster, but still, she came closer to him undauntedly.
It was surreal to have this woman in his life when he thought he wouldn’t fall for anyone anymore. But here he was, succumbing to her presence and unable to let her go.
It started with her giving him the Blue Moon pack, but it ended up with him giving her his whole heart.
There was nothing much, though. His heart was not pretty, after all. It had been broken and shattered into a million pieces, but by some miracle, it was still beating and now, it beat for her...
"You did nothing wrong," Cane said softly, he grabbed her hands and kissed her knuckles solemnly. "I am disappointed, because in the end, I still hurt you."
"No, you didn’t." Iris was adamant. She felt uneasy when she thought Cane wouldn’t try it again with her. Well, she only said she was sore, but she didn’t complain...
Cane chuckled again, he could see how eager Iris was to prove that she was fine, when the evidence was all over her skin.
"You need to eat more and rest." Cane kissed the tip of her nose and stood up right in time someone knocked on the door to deliver Iris’ meals and medicines.
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